is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
