At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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