i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
we're so committed to being not committed
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
