Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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