they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Did I show you my penis last night?
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
