You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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