I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
