Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Randomize
