it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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