ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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