Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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