New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
