If i come over, it means nothing
I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
