How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
