the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
