You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
