we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Are my feet made of real feet?
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
