2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
