Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
