True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I just had sex on a roof
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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