Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
