please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Randomize
