S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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