Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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