i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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