that's an acceptable place to lick
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
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