I wanna bring you to show and tell
He uses pillows to masturbate.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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