So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I am midnight drunk by noon
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
