Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I supernannyed him into submission
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
