i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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