He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Randomize
