His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
So much Jack, so little girl.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
