btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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