I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
