Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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