I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
