Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
