We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
