Walk of Shame. In a state park.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
My feet surprised me
Randomize
