i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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