She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
