fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I'm eating all of the evidence.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
