Quick, to the slutcave!
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
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