apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
