I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
