No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
