I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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