If that was your dad, he is hot
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
