so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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