They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Randomize
