is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I will pee on everything he values.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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